When I wuz young, har har har!

I thought this was pretty funny – thanks for sending it to me, Dani! Best for people who participated in the 1980s.

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning…. uphill BOTH ways… yadda, yadda, yadda

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they’ve got it!

But now that… I’m over the ripe old age of thirty, I can’t help but look around and notice the youth of today. You’ve got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don’t know how good you’ve got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn’t have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!

There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter … with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

There were no MP3’s or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ’d usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!

And talk of about hardship? You couldn’t just download porn! You had to steal it from your brother or bribe some homeless dude to buy you a copy of “Hustler” at the 7-11! Those were your options!

We didn’t have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that’s it! We didn’t have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just don’t know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn’t have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari Super Pong! With games like Space Invaders” and “Asteroids” and the graphics sucked! Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever!

And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn’t see, you were just screwed!

Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15 channels and there was no onscreen menu and no remote control! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on!

You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning.

Do you hear what I’m saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!

And we didn’t have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up. we had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire…imagine that!

If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid JiffyPop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.

That’s exactly what I’m talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You’re spoiled.

You guys wouldn’t have lasted five minutes back in 1980!

Regards,
The Over-30 Crowd

From: xicestorm@earthlink.net

🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

Unpleasant but necessary to say

I had an experience today that made me think about my wishes in the case of permanent, irreversible damage to my brain. If I’m not “me” anymore – can’t talk, can’t communicate or take care of myself, please let me go. Don’t place the burden of decision on my caregivers – it’s MY choice to exit gracefully when there’s no hope of recovery.

OK? Thank you.

Love,
Emmy

Finally made it up to Crystal River!

Crystal River State Archaeological SiteAunt Susie and I took a trip up to the Crystal River area to check out the Archaeological Site and Fort Island beach. The Indian site was very interesting, I would like to go back there and explore the entire thing — who wants to go with me? 🙂 The picture to the left is the way to the top of the ceremonial mound which is built entirely of shells. It’s quite steep and pretty tall (that’s a guy standing at the top of the stairs). It’s fun to think about how the Indians lived and wonder why did they do this or that and to notice the similarities as well. Even then, people liked to be buried with their favorite stuff.

The second stop of the day was lunch. We ended up at Applebee’s after picking a random place called Oyster’s. When we walked in to the first place, it smelled of seafood really bad and now that I think back on it, the people at the tables didn’t really look very happy. We looked at the menu and decided it was too expensive and smelly, so we shucked on outta Oyster’s and found Applebee’s instead. Aunt Susie says they have the best raspberry lemonade of anywhere. I’m glad we went there because we had a delicious lunch of shrimp & spinach salad and half a turkey sandwich on ciabatta bread. It was yummy!! Both dishes had bacon, mmmmmm :p~

Next stop was the beach, where there was not one good shell to be found. So instead of picking up shells, I picked up two loads of trash! It’s an OK beach if you just want to lay in the sun or something boring. You have to go south of where we live to have a good beach. Next week, Honeymoon Island!

On the way home, we stopped at a bargain outlet mall place that we’ve been meaning to check out. That was a really good part of the day! Aunt Susie found some nice yarn for cheap, and I found a place to buy a guitar when I’m ready. Plus the guy can get my flute repadded, which is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. I like to get out the flute and play along with my favorite songs, hey it’s instrumental karaoke! hehe

Then we took the extra scenic route home, via Aripeka… Aunt Susie noticed how it’s like stepping back in time when you pass through. It’s just a sleepy little town on the shore with tiny houses tucked amid sawgrass marshes, with lots of sabal palms and bear crossing signs. It’s not a shortcut home, but it sure is a lot prettier than strip malls and endless traffic.

So we had a good day of exploration, can’t wait for next week’s trip!

Yankee or Dixie?

Here’s a fun little test you can take to see what your influences have been, dialect-wise. I scored 42, which means I’m pretty close to the middle of the scale… 0 being Yankee, 100 being Dixie. Neat!

Yankee or Dixie quiz

Thanks again, Trav (who scored 31), for a fun way to spend a few minutes! Love ya.

Speaking of Easter candy…

The peeps are almost hard enough now, and there’s still one row left! Cool.

Bleys got something in his basket this year which reminded me of some really neat confections we used to get as kids… candy eggshells with the side cut out and pictures inside. The outside had fancy, hard icing – the kind that dissolves almost instantly. In fact, the whole shell was made out of that stuff. I wish I could remember what those were called. I looked on google but couldn’t get the right keywords.

Our family got all kinds of interesting Easter candy… big chocolate eggs with filling inside which we would put on a plate and slice into slabs of gooey chocolaty goodness. And our baskets were hidden by the Easter Bunny, all over the house! One of my favorite things was to dig around in the grass to see if I could find a stray jelly bean or some other bonus stuck down at the bottom. It kinda felt like I won something when I found candy hidden away in the grass. 🙂

Update:

It turns out I did have the right keywords, I just didn’t look far enough! I found out those eggs are called Panoramic Easter Egg. I also found a recipe for them, which I might try some time! I’m sure it would take some practice to get them so beautiful. I also found a fun site featuring old-time candy.

Hoppy Easter

Bleys cutting pieFor Easter, we went over to Gramma’s house and had quite a feast. Here’s Bleys, carefully cutting the picture-perfect lemon meringue pie Aunt Susie made. I really like this picture of him because it represents much of what he is… careful, thoughtful and fully paying attention to what he’s doing at the moment.

I always love the days after Easter, too, because you can get the best candy of the year at half price or better! Today’s find was peeps – I’ve torn open the wrapping so they’ll get nice and stale (it takes 4 or 5 days). Mmmmmm! Crunchy peeps.

New Smyrna Beach

Emmy at New Smyrna BeachLast weekend we went to New Smyrna Beach to visit Trav’s grandma. After a delicious meal of roast beast, potatoes, green bean casserole and rolls, we took a little trip to the beach (it’s only a couple of miles away). It’s very strange there – you can drive right down onto the beach. It’s weird to have to look both ways before going to the water. I don’t care for it at all.

There were lots of critters washed up on the beach that day… portugese man o’ war with their long, stinging tentacles, and these little disks called blue buttons.

The beach is my favorite place to go. We often wonder, if we lived that close to the beach, how much work we would get done! I suppose one might tire of it after a while, but I don’t think I would. I could make a new business… doing something with shells… or something. 🙂

Shells!

I love going to the beach to look for shells and other interesting things. Today I found a list on CNN which tells what beaches are best for finding good stuff:

CNN’s list of best beaches for shelling

Sanibel (#1 on the list) is a 5-6 hour drive from us. Cumberland Island in Georgia is probably about the same, so when I can find someone to go with me, yeah baby!! It would have to be an overnight trip for sure. Who wants to go? 🙂

Exploring Crystal River, FL

I’m planning a trip with Aunt Susie for Thursday. We’re going up to Crystal River to see an ancient Indian site and to check out a new beach – Fort Island Gulf Beach. Plus we can stop at the Yulee Sugar Mill ruins. To get to the furthest destination, it’s a little over an hour drive from our house, so it ought to be a good, full day of sightseeing!

Embroidery Project Completed!

Here’s a picture of my first completed project – it’s counted cross-stitch. I saw this at the craft store and really liked it. Plus, it said “Great for beginners!” so I thought what the heck… I’m make it for my brother-in-law and his family for Christmas. That was in October of 2006! It took me until January 2007 to complete it. I had no idea how much time it would take and I tell ya… I have a new appreciation for people who do needlework. My mom made a koala bear for me, and my sister made a beautiful wall hanging and now I know the kind of effort required to create a gift like that, so thanks again, Mom and Kelly!!

Embroidery - Family is a Circle of Love

Jury Duty

Yesterday I had to show up for a jury summons, and I got picked! I’m very happy to be doing my civic duty. It’s a criminal trial and it’s very interesting… I’m learning a lot about our legal system. For example, the number of jurors for a trial is determined by the state. In Florida, only three kinds of trials get a 12-person jury… murder, fraud and one other thing I can’t remember. All other trials only have a 6-person jury. Now I can see why our justice system is so backed up – not a whole lot of people get moved through the courts. It’s sad that one person’s alleged bad acts can make extra work for so many others. Think of what great things we could do with all that money we pour into the correctional system.

The sad part of the whole thing is how people complain about having to be there. I understand they have other things to do but we have to take the bad along with the good in this country. We have the greatest place in the world to live because people take the time to make sure justice is done.

Save the Penguins!

The other day I was looking for a recipe for something with cream cheese in it, and I just had to make these for a family gathering today:

Penguins!

They’re made out of olives, cream cheese and carrots. The scarves are roasted red peppers. Aunt Susie made a little sign that said “Save the Penguins!!” hehehehe (I think she was having a little trouble eating them). I found the instructions on AllRecipes.com.

The Husband Store

My friend John sent this joke and I just had to post it. Trav’s cousin Tim is visiting and we talked about relationships a little bit, and the differences between men & women so this seems like a good day to share…

The Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City,
where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at
the entrance is a description of how the store operates.
You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the
attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.
There is, however, a catch: you may choose any man from a particular
floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back
down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 – These men have jobs.

The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 – These men have jobs and love kids.

The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking. “Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:
Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework. “Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it.”

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:
Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 – You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men
on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are
impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

A New Wives store opened across the street.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.
The third through sixth floors have never been visited.

Hello World!

Hi there. I’m Emily and this is my place to store and share the random bits of life I want to capture… things I find interesting, amusing, useful, etc. I’ll probably share some stories of life from time to time as well. I’ll try to be interesting but can’t make any guarantees. 🙂